My Life In 5 Years

Picture it: Huge cactus next to the back porch, dirt for a driveway. Over-hang on the front of the door with an attractive bistro table set up. Community pool staring you in the face every day as you sit in the front of your house. You wander inside for a mixed drink from your mini bar that you made the night before and had extra of. Grab your favorite book and wide brimmed hat and head back outside to wait for your friend to get home. Putting your headphones in, you get a call from someone back home wondering how you are, and where you’ve gone. You tell them not to worry and that you’re living your life to the fullest where you should have been in the first place. You tell them that they should make a journey to visit or that they should get with the times and video chat you so you can show them everything you’ve accomplished the last few years. You tell them, “Sometimes you need to leave everything behind to start the next chapter in your life to experience new horizons.” It’s been a few years since you’ve been back home, and part of you feels no repentance for leaving everything you left behind. While you miss your family and friends back there, especially your mother and grandparents, there’s no other way you’d have wanted to spend your early 30’s than adventuring out west.

Cut back to a few years ago at 27 Years Old – you decide to tell everyone that you’re out. Done and gone with everything and everyone on the east coast and are in search of adventure. You’re in search of a job you love and a place you can call home. It’s the end of the summer and you’re not ready for it to be cold again over in the PA Mountains. You just want dirt and sun and some Death Valley vibes. You’re determined to do this on your own, and if anyone should follow, then you’ll at least have some company. At the time of commencement, you’ve found no one to adventure with you, but you’re still determined to leave it all behind and go forth with the new adventure that is your life. Different climate, different time zone and different people all around you. Maybe you’ll meet someone great out there and learn to grow as a person. But of course, these are all maybes, as this is never guaranteed.

You’ll throw everything out you own and make everything new when you get out there. Your mom will fly out there to meet you with your precious kitties so they too can have a better life. They wouldn’t like the car ride, and you’ll have to take your car out there with you, of course – so you can get to your new job as an Internet Brand Ambassador. The only thing you’d need to send out there for certain is the mattress you have that you love so much. If IKEA is a thing out there, that I’ve now confirmed that there is one out there, that’s where you’ll go to revamp everything in the apartment, including a mini bar for wine like you’ve always wanted.

Things can only go up from here, right? You’ve put up with so much the last few years – from dating someone who you almost firmly believe is gay, to moving all around and being stood up by people who you thought were your friends and now staying at a job you hate because you need to be able to afford to live and have a place to call home. When do things get better? When do things get easier for someone who struggles daily? When is your break? Your break comes when you are ready. Your break comes when you stand up and tell yourself you’ve had enough and you need a change. Break up with that person who wasn’t making you happy. Worry about yourself and not what others do. If they don’t give you the time of day – they’re not your friend and never were to begin with. Get rid of those folks in your life that don’t benefit you in every single way that you need them to. You’re who matters in this life, not anyone else that is not beneficial to your life. It’s time to do you – and it’s time to move to a new location, with new everything to start over. Every now and then it just has to be done. 

Time with yourself is the most treasured time there is – and that time is now. 

XOXOX

Koral Dawn

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